You ever have days where you’re extremely busy and you need a refresher. Something to help you mentally bounce back, remind you who you are, where you want to be and what it takes to get there? Well, this article was written for you! Self care is a trendy phrase that you may hear what, like every day now? Yeah it’s cool to do a facial and treat ourselves to a pedicure and pretend that’s all we really need at the moment to get our life together but let’s talk about the inane details that are blind to the eye in regards to self care.

Punctuality + Time Management

Nothing’s worse than rushing everywhere and never feeling on time. For one, it never looks good professionally – even if its family oriented. Two, you will never amount to being the very best you if you’re always running out of time to complete everything that could possibly be accomplished in one day. Have you ever seen that coffee mug that says, “You have the same 24 hrs as Beyonce?” The pessimistic side of me answered a while back, “Well yeah, but she also has an entourage and always have. As I grew wisdom and became more responsible, I mentally noted the mug is right. So what she has an entourage? As she gets better, her team grows. Like us, as we get better, our team grows. Every successful person starts off with a team. Don’t let anyone ever tell you they did anything “all by themselves.” As they became well connected, it took the right person(s) or moment for everything to finally click. Maybe our entourage is our mom, our grandmother, our siblings, the person you met who’s dope at doing graphics etc. Just, be on time for everything and get shit done in a timely fashion. EXCUSES ARE FOR THE WEAK. No one cares what you got goin' on. Family drama, huh? Guess what, that’s nothing new. Figure it out, change your environment. You know how they say first impressions are everything? Well so is your latest report. If you want people to work with you, recommend working with you and take you seriously, be punctual. It is unhealthy to go around always feeling rushed anyway. It builds anxiety and paranoia.

Assertiveness + Aggression

While conducting business; know when and how to assert yourself. Being passive and overly friendly doesn’t pay the bills. It’s okay to turn down opportunities that don’t match your agenda as a businesswoman. This isn’t a “not everyone can sit at the table” thing, it’s a “my time is money, knowledge or skill. If you can’t provide one, then sorry, I’ll have to pass." You can’t assist everyone who wants to “collab.” Your time is precious and baby; know that you are worth every penny of it! Do not feel ashamed or embarrassed to request what you believe your work ethic is worth. They don’t like it, fuck’em! *Bernie Mac voice.  People will negotiate paying little to nothing IF you allow them to. At 23 years old, I still have to remind myself this. Oh, and stop saying yes to everything all the time. It’s cool to miss outings with the crew to:

• Recharge

• Update Your Calendar

• Rearrange house stuff to alter the aesthetic

• Get caught up on bills/ save $

• Catch up on reruns you’ve seen a million times already

• Map out some goals - when it’s written or placed on a mood board, it has a significantly higher chance in becoming real.

• Respond to those emails you've been meaning to get back to

• Explore Yourself

Checking In

Have you ever just “checked in” with yourself? Did you eat today? Did you consume too much social media today and is it affecting your spirit? Is there a real reason why you’re not too fond of x, y & z. What could you be doing better right now? What could you do to reward yourself for doing all that you’ve done this week? Being a woman and a work-aholic can put a toll on our bodies, inside and out. Nails chipping, texture of skin altering- lookin’ all supreme pizza-like, pH balance off. Emotional, having random break downs when we’re in the shower – weight all up and down. Parts of our body saggin’, leaning in directions it doesn’t usually lean in. Sex drive low. Don’t want to be bothered let alone even looked at. Girl . . . Can you relate or am I just talking about myself? We really push our body and mind to the point we run into a wall. We overwork ourselves because we’re so eager to put ourselves in a better position financially and out do what's already been done before, that we forget breaks are good & vacations are even better. In America, spending time with family or doing absolutely nothing is viewed as a crime. America has built this false ideology that if you’re not working 24/7 and you’re not team no sleep, you ain’t workin’ hard enough. That’s bullshit. Get you some rest girl. When I visited Montana for the first time, it was so refreshing to just rest, visit the mountains and listen to silence. It felt so damn good that I almost felt guilty.

After filling out your “To-dos” for the week, pencil something in that you could look forward to. I’m a foodie, I LOVE food. My treat for myself is the Ghirardelli Dark Chocolate & Sea Salt Caramel Bars… with the caramel oozing out, causing a drizzle down the lip and chin, resulting in me having to jerk my head back a bit to catch it? Girl…. Or should I say “bitchhhhh….”All the working “by the book" bloggers/professionals, excuse my ratchet gal vernacular. Anyhow, tonight I’m making Thai Green Curry with Sautéed Shrimp inspired by Noodles & Company. Originally I was going to order take out for completing my exams then I randomly decided to buy all the ingredients so I can have a big pot of it - saves money for the week, ya’ know? Of course you can go big, book a trip to wherever but I personally notice a shift in my mood when I have consistent small things to look forward to. It also helps me difuse depression spells. 

Be You, Not Them

Comparing is dangerous and is the recipe for failure. It will rob you of your joy and time. You might as well water someone else's grass while yours turn golden yellow, because that’s what you’re doing. You’re feeding someone else energy and time that can be applied into what you have going for yourself. What you see of someone else is always what they want you to see. They have every right in showcasing only what they want you to see – so… get over it.

No one can be better than you being you, even if it’s imitated.

Embrace where you are and all it took to get there. Not only does it build character, not only does it make a great story but you never know who’s watching and who you’re inspiring. SO KEEP GOING! LOVE YOURSELF! TAKE CARE OF YOURSELF! YOU GOT THIS, GIRL! I’m rooting for you! The whole community of badasses are rooting for you! XO!