HEAL GIRL, HEAL!
“Healing for me is______?” If someone were to ask you that question and to fill in the blank how would you respond? On September 7th I attended the “Heal Girl, Heal!”event hosted by Suncerrae (Sunne) Perry-Baily which featured four panelists; Lin Casurra, Patrice Hunter, Lakiesha Russel and Bridget Wilder. All of these women were so fierce and down to earth. They were all asked before the event, “What is healing to you?” They were given a month to ponder on that question knowing it'd be the first question asked for the panel discussion. Sunne didn’t elaborate on the question asking, “How do you act on or practice it,” or “how would you define it?” She simply wanted the panelists to freely express themselves with no direction or influence other than their very own perception. There were three different answers but four completely different stories being told to support their answers. The word healing is an ambiguous topic. Like the perception of love, art, and beauty, there is no true way to define healing besides using your own perspective. I’m grateful for being able to hear powerful women share their transparency in regards to their growth and healing. Before I dive into the panel, I want you to ask yourself, what does healing mean to you?
Prior to the panel, there was a meet and greet. Guests enjoyed the food and beverages while stopping at different vendors.
“RETAIL THERAPY” (Vendors Present)
Perseverance Nutrition Consultation/Staffing Agency LLC
“FLY IN 5 DEMO” (ICE BREAKER)
What I admired about the “Retail Therapy” and “Fly in 5 Demo” is that they all highlighted the theme of healing. As an icebreaker Sunne did a presentation on quick ways to spruce up our appearance with videos, demos, and DIY tips. When we look good we feel good, right? She got one of the audience members involved and showed how she uses a half wig for days she’s pressing for time. While doing the demo, she embraced the woman’s natural hair and style with many compliments. The presentation was fun and full of laughter. As a joke she played a short clip of what the demo would not look like before she applied the wig and make up on the volunteer. The volunteer was also able to keep the wig as a gift. There were many gifts and raffles throughout the event. No one left without a gift bag. I won a journal which I hoped and prayed for. I’ve been so “frugal” lately and haven't treated myself to a new journal, yet here I was, walking in the event early with my iced caramel frappuccino equivalent to the price of the journal I want. I also won a wig but gifted the wig to a lady sitting at my table. The event was so well planned. Each gift bag came with a notepad and pen for taking notes. There were decorated Kleenex boxes on each table as well as framed healing quotes.
H.E.A.L THYSELF INTRODUCTION
As the demo came to an end, Sunne presented HER MEANING & acronym she created for H.E.A.L:
Honesty Examine - Act - Love thyself
Paraphrasing Sunne, while healing, we have to honestly examine what we’re healing from. Why we’re in that position. What lead to getting there. This requires both reflection and accountability. Once we examine the problem, we can’t just sit there wishful or miserable. We have to get up and act on it. Make a decision. “You can love God as much as you want but you have to be proactive. God is not going to do the work for you. Healing is a selfish commitment. You have to say, I have to do it for me. Ask yourself, How can I act? What can I do? Not acting as in putting on a front, acting as in being proactive.” Being proactive is followed by “Loving Thyself.” “You can’t just get to your healing, you have to get through it and maintain your healing.” Practicing different acts of love will help during your journey of healing.
She used the Netflix Film, Bird Box, as a reference to us being afraid of what we cannot see. She mentioned after watching the film she researched the word box. As there is an array of definitions, the word box is a verb that can be used to enclose or contain. When we carry all the weight of emotions from healing, we often box ourselves in. We make ourselves feel alone. As an exercise, all of the guests were blindfolded, like the film. If we could relate to a question being asked, we were to raise our hands. Each question related to abuse, of any kind, experiencing depression, molestation, suicidal thoughts or knowing someone who was suicidal, heartbreak, etc. For the last question she asked if we were to relate to any of the questions asked, to please stand. Once standing, she asked all the guests to remove their blindfolds. Each woman in that room stood and looked around the room, including myself. There were silent cries and deep cries during this exercise which lead to many hugs from loved ones and strangers. After consoling, there was a prayer, long prayer.
It’s funny because I brought my make-up pouch just in case for quick touch ups throughout the event. Skin might get too oily, ya’ know? But nope, that prayer hit me and hit me hard, then came the waterworks. I thought damn, why-did-I-wear-makeup-in the first place. Why must I wear a white vintage suit! I actually tried opening my eyes a few times mid-prayer and distract myself to keep me from connecting and getting emotional while having a series of vain thoughts. “If I keep blinking would my mascara run harder and faster? Do I have raccoon eyes right now? This suit, if there's any makeup residue dripping I will be mortified! Another bill. Great, will have to take to the cleaners tomorrow. Shit.. shit. Shit. I can’t even see right now.” Then something came over me. As if someone whispered, let it go. I’m glad I released energy I didn't even know I was holding onto. With Sunne’s powerful voice, deep growling and raspy-like mid prayer, I couldn't help but remove myself from my self conscious and superficial thoughts.
THE PANEL
Just before the panel started, Sunne introduced what type of energy that’d be carried out during and after the event. She made it known that she was creating a safe space for everyone to express themselves and tell their stories. Their stories are to be kept sacred among us all and if anyone was to share a story told, it is to be told by the teller and not the listener.
Sunne shared her story first. Then asked the big question I can finally revisit, “Healing for me is_____”.
Speakers response:
“Healing is my promise” - Lindsey Casurra
“Healing is self love” - Bridget Wilder
“Healing is self love” - Patrice Hunter
“Healing is my responsibility” - Lakiesha Russel
Although I can't go into detail of what any of these women triumphed through during their life journey but I will say this, us women, men too; we often pack on a series of situations that weigh us down. We carry the worries, sometimes the same fears of our mothers and fathers during infancy. We become sponges to our environment. As we age, our lifestyle (behind closed doors) reflects the trauma within and/or once experienced during our innocent or vulnerable stages of life. From surface level issues to the threshold of our existence. We all carry our stories differently. The photographer present, a male, asked to share something really quickly after the panel discussion. No one had any idea what would be said and his testimony made an impact to say the least. He mentioned that he had seen his family in each woman present and he too left the event feeling healed. At the table there was a key for each person. Before leaving the event we all said a toast and were asked to write down what healing meant to us on our key. At the time I couldn't think on the spot. Tried to be fancy, research words on Dictionary.com. Nothing felt right. These past few weeks I gave it thought and for me, healing is discipline.
I never really gave myself a moment to reflect on my journey of healing but as I do it today, I am proud of the courage I’ve endured and keeping myself accountable for wanting change while doing everything it takes to get to where I aspire to be mentally, emotionally, and financially.
I’ll like to thank everyone involved in the “Heal Girl, Heal!” event. I admire women who take a unique approach on women empowerment events. It's one thing to make an event “Instagram worthy” but it’s much more fulfilling to be apart of something that can spark change, an idea, growth, and most importantly, healing.
If you don’t mind, please complete the following sentence in the comments below: “Healing for me is______.”
KEY-NOTE SPEAKER/HOST BACKGROUND
Suncerrae (Sunne) Perry-Bailey
A mother of three, ministry leader, mental health professional who possesses a BAS in Education from University of WI-Whitewater and a Master of Science in Social Work with an emphasis in mental health and substance abuse counseling from the University of WI-Milwaukee. Sunne has exhibited devotion to human services, her research interest and her professional experience within higher education, public schools, multiple Wisconsin correctional institutions, AmeriCorp, Aurora Healthcare and the Veteran’s Health Administration.
PANELISTS BACKGROUND
Lindsey Caurra
A former social worker, who has spent over a decade serving and supporting families in the community. Her educational background includes a BA in English and an MBA. She’s dedicated to helping the youth and adults engage in healthy relationships, deeper spiritually, education and career advancement.
A widowed mother of nine children, motivational speaker, and entrepreneur. She is the owner of Perseverance Health and Wellness Coaching, where she counsels women on weight loss, the importance of self-confidence and self-love. She graduated from Mount Mary University with a Bachelor’s of Science Degree to become to become a registered Dietitian and minored in Psychology.
A mother who is a Licensed Professional Counselor in the state of WI, and sought after speaker whose also known as America's #1 Mental Wellness Ambassador . Lakiesha has been seen on NBC, CBS, Huffington Post, Bustle, Milwaukee Magazine. Lakiesha is the visionary and founder of The Evolving Chair Counseling and Consulting Agency, which focuses on providing services to children and women who have experienced trauma, depression, anxiety, etc. (Read more here)
A Chase-Mortgage Adviser Analyst in Wealth Management. She achieved a role as a Cash Flow Strategist of MyEcon who partners with CEOs, executives and entrepreneurs to leverage their sources of income, debt elimination strategies and grow their personal and professional brands. Patrice has landed partnerships with Women On The Move (WOTM), Black Organization for Leadership (BOLD), NextGen - Leadership Development for Early Career Professionals and is a proud member of Alpha Kappa Alpha Sorority Inc. Patrice holds a BA in finance from the University of WI-Whitewater and an MBA in business from Alverno College.